


Past mistakes, Future regrets

by Kaiiso



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion, Original characters - Fandom
Genre: Confessions, Cute, Depression, End of Evangelion, Hyato - Freeform, Love, Multi, MxM - Freeform, OCs - Freeform, Sadness, Yaoi, abel - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-02
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-03 20:27:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 1,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8728957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaiiso/pseuds/Kaiiso
Summary: Poems crafted by my NGE OC, Hyato Bokeo. These are scattered around and are poems written by him to others around him. Weather good, bad, to a lover, or his EVA unit, These are the things Hyato writes to pass the time and keep himself engaged in the cold quarters of the building he lives in. I do hope you enjoy!This will also be my first work here, so criticism is welcomed (As long as its not too harsh..!!)





	1. Chapter 1

I can’t seem to stop staring  
Weather at the ocean eyes you hold within the cold building  
Or the light hair you keep together so naturally  
Your smiles keep my stressful days light and weightless  
Your voice like the sound of charms that cease to exist in the cold halls  
Tranced by your being, I seem to stop and admire  
Like a child seeing a toy he can’t get due to the price  
But would stare and admire for as long as he could  
The grey walls and mocking words around us seem so distant when we lock ourselves away and chat quietly in safe quarters  
You are an inspiration for me to keep going  
And keep going I will  
-H


	2. Abel

Tragedy  
Denial  
Suffocation  
Acceptance  
You wish for some of these to end  
And others to begin  
But, I ask ye  
Why?  
Why would you want to fit in?  
Be deemed as normal?  
I see no point, for you are perfect as you are now  
I’d ask nor nothing more, nor anything less  
Perhaps a bad past calls for a new beginning?  
Or a faltered lifestyle begs for you to start anew?   
I do not know of the past  
Only the present  
And, for that, I am grateful  
I like the Abel now  
The one who has moved past the bad, and has made the present good  
It shows not only strength, but loyalty even  
To those around that you will be you, no matter what has happened   
And, in turn  
We will stay by your side  
Please, do not change who you are  
Abel  
You are perfect  
And if I and few others see that?  
Then so be it  
You deserve loyal friends and people  
Rather than back stabbing normal's who care nothing about you  
-H


	3. Those At NERV

I did not understand, at first, the reasoning as to why you were present  
You seem to fit in well  
Be caring to all no matter what they may have done, or why they did it  
You encourage behaviors based upon your gut  
Admirable  
But undesirable to others, however, not me  
You… seem to be that one person people need to keep going  
A motivation  
A purpose to keep efforts up, for many here  
It’s in there eyes, the glint they get when you walk into the room and say their name  
Keep it up  
Keep it up for all of us  
Because, I believe  
Without you  
We would all be deathly  
Lost  
-H


	4. The 'Damned' EVA Pilots/Those who have caused pain

To the man whom gave birth to you  
Dishonor  
To the mother's egg who carried you   
Dishonor  
You are the base of evil  
You and the she wolf who bickers at school  
Ah, sweet jealousy  
It has consumed your damned soul  
Are you, perhaps, an Angle?  
Shall I take my dear Knight and end your life?  
Or maybe, something worse  
Dismantle your body  
Part by part, so you can suffer the years of pain you have spread on others  
Sounds fitting  
But messy  
Dishonor  
Dishonor  
Dishonor  
You truly are an dissapointment  
A Douchebag  
An failed, EVA pilot  
Why do you bother?  
I wonder this many times a day  
If you know you can’t do as well as others  
Why bother?  
Why bother?  
Why.  
Bother.  
Is it because you think you can keep people swaying your way?  
Wrong  
Perhaps, you think you can get into Abel's head and find the secret?  
Wrong  
The answers you seek, are not around you  
Nor in your genes  
Or Unit  
Or soul  
You, have been deemed an Angle by me  
So watch your back  
I will attack  
Not just by my lonesome  
But with my fist in red  
And an army of those you have played your jokes upon  
All of us striking back  
-H


	5. A 'Deceased' Abel

\-----  
What do you say to the dead?  
\-----  
Abel?  
\----  
Abel?  
\----  
Words mean nothing to the dead  
They can’t hear you  
Their ears no longer work  
Eyes no longer open  
And there is always a blame to be placed  
Weather upon medication  
Disease  
….  
Others  
Abel…  
This was my fault  
All of it  
The screams  
The pain  
All of it  
There is no one else to look to  
No one else to point fingers at  
I’m sorry…  
Imsorry  
Imsorry  
IM.  
SO.  
SORRY.  
I.  
HAVE.  
FAILED.  
YOU.  
Curse my soul  
Bless me to die  
I no longer know what to do  
I am distraught  
I am in pain  
I miss you….  
Abel…  
-H


	6. Me, Myself, and I (Hyato himself)

What have you done?  
Why did you let it happen?  
He was right there  
RIGHT  
THERE  
Not even far enough to be out of sight  
The Angel was close  
You could have FINISHED it  
Idiot  
Idiot  
You fucking idiot  
Who is the failure now?  
You  
You are  
You, Hyato Bokeo  
Are an unfit  
Useless  
Joke of an EVA Pilot  
Leave  
Hide  
Disappear  
You have caused enough pain  
Enough tragedy  
After all  
Did you not break your word?  
Promise?  
You said nothing more would happen to him  
That you wouldn’t let it  
And now  
Hes.  
Dead.  
Hyato Bokeo  
You are a fool  
A fool to think you could keep such words  
A fool to think Abel was just a friend  
No  
He was a lover  
And you couldn’t admit that  
He obviously loved you  
You could tell  
Deny all feelings  
Deny  
Deny  
DENY  
No, you can’t now  
But you're too late to tell him  
Went back on your word  
No time to confess  
Dead  
Your fault  
Start over  
Redo  
Redo  
Hyato Bokeo gets no ‘Redo’  
But he can certainly start over  
But will he regret it?  
(Yes)  
-H


	7. An Different Abel

He is not the same  
He has changed  
But so have I  
…  
Who is to blame?  
Is it I, who had once failed to do anything?  
Or is it he?  
Who can’t even remember my being anymore?  
It must be my looks  
I shouldn't have….  
How could I have….  
Perhaps it's my fault  
And I just finally want to play the  
Blame  
Game  
But perhaps it's not mine  
Perhaps its his  
His for not being able to even recognize the person he had fallen for  
What do I do?  
What to do  
What to do  
What  
To  
Do  
I no longer know  
Nor do I want to anymore  
I  
Want  
Things  
To  
Be  
Different


	8. Hyato Himself

I swore he was kind  
For once, I could see a change  
We talked  
We sang  
We even ate dinner in one another's private quarters  
He was there with me  
Helping my sobbing state of horrid thoughts  
He took me into his arms  
Assured me everything will be fine  
“I’m sure Abel will be proud of you and I”  
His words  
His words I believed so strongly  
Words I swore to hear ring in my ears  
Gave me hope  
They gave me hope  
He gave me hope  
For once, I thought I had another friend  
I had someone other than Abel by my side  
But  
I should have know  
It wouldn’t have lasted long  
I fell for it again  
False words  
False help  
False satisfaction  
I fell for more lies  
…  
Why do I always fall for lies?


End file.
